The Year My Life Was Put on Hold: How I Found My Calling When the World Shut Down
- Alison Atkinson

- Feb 19
- 12 min read
The world hitting the brakes in 2020 felt like a collective pause button was pushed. For many of us, life just stopped. Plans went out the window, routines dissolved, and suddenly, there was a lot of quiet. It was during this unexpected stillness that I, like many others, found myself looking inward. This period, though challenging, became a surprising catalyst for personal growth and helped me figure out what truly mattered. It turns out, sometimes you need the world to stop so you can start finding your own way, and for me, books played a huge part in that journey.
Key Takeaways
The pandemic forced an unexpected pause, creating space for introspection and a reevaluation of life's direction.
Embracing uncertainty and letting go of pre-existing plans were crucial steps in rediscovering personal meaning.
Books served as a vital source of solace and perspective, guiding the process of finding purpose during isolation.
The experience highlighted the importance of resilience and prioritizing inner well-being when facing global disruption.
The lessons learned about personal growth and finding a calling continue to shape life long after the initial pause.
When the World Stood Still
It feels like just yesterday, but also a lifetime ago, when the world collectively hit the pause button. One minute, life was a whirlwind of plans, deadlines, and the usual hustle. The next, everything just... stopped. Borders slammed shut, streets emptied, and the familiar rhythm of daily life was replaced by an eerie quiet. It was disorienting, to say the least. I remember feeling this strange mix of shock and a weird sense of calm. Suddenly, all the things I thought were so important seemed to fade into the background.
The Unexpected Pause
Nobody saw it coming, right? One day we were worrying about traffic or what to make for dinner, and the next, we were facing a global shutdown. It was like the universe decided we all needed a time-out. My own plans, which felt so solid just weeks before, evaporated. Trips were canceled, events were postponed indefinitely, and the future suddenly looked like a big question mark. It was a jarring halt to the momentum we were all used to.
A Forced Reset
This unexpected pause, as disruptive as it was, turned out to be a much-needed reset. With all the external noise silenced, there was nowhere to hide from ourselves. We were forced to slow down, to look inward, and to re-evaluate what truly mattered. It was a chance to shed the unnecessary and to focus on the core of who we are. For me, this meant confronting a lot of things I'd been pushing aside.
Finding Clarity in the Quiet
In the stillness that followed, something remarkable happened. The constant distractions of everyday life faded, and a sense of clarity began to emerge. It was in this quiet space that I started to hear my own thoughts more clearly. The silence wasn't empty; it was filled with potential. This period allowed for a deep introspection, a chance to understand myself better without the usual pressures. It was during this time that I began to explore new interests, like delving into books about China's economic recovery and how different societies were adapting.
Rediscovering Myself Amidst Uncertainty
When everything outside screeched to a halt, it felt like the world had pressed pause on my own life too. All those plans I had, the career ladder I was climbing, the trips I was saving for – they all just… stopped. It was disorienting, to say the least. For a while, I just drifted, feeling a bit lost without the usual structure.
Letting Go of Old Plans
It was tough, honestly. I had this whole roadmap for my life, and suddenly, the road just disappeared. It felt like a huge waste, all that effort and anticipation. But as the days turned into weeks, I started to see that maybe these old plans weren't serving me anymore. They were built for a world that no longer existed, at least not in the same way. It was time to acknowledge that and start thinking differently.
Re-evaluating priorities: What truly mattered when the usual distractions were gone?
Accepting change: Realizing that clinging to the past wouldn't help me move forward.
Finding freedom: Discovering that letting go could actually be liberating.
Embracing the Unknown
This was the hardest part. I’m someone who likes to know what’s coming next. The uncertainty of it all was a constant hum of anxiety in the background. But I also noticed something interesting: when I stopped fighting it and just tried to be present, the fear lessened. It was like learning to swim in choppy waters instead of trying to stop the waves.
The quiet moments, once filled with the dread of what might happen, slowly became opportunities to simply be. It was in this space that I started to hear my own thoughts more clearly, away from the usual noise.
The Search for Meaning
With so much time on my hands and old goals out the window, I found myself asking bigger questions. What was I actually passionate about? What kind of impact did I want to make? It wasn't about climbing a corporate ladder anymore; it was about finding something that felt genuinely fulfilling. This led me down paths I never expected, including exploring how different people approach life, like the insights found in Captivating Charisma. It was a period of deep introspection, trying to figure out what truly made me tick.
Exploring new hobbies and interests.
Connecting with people on a deeper level.
Considering how my skills could be used for something more.
This period of forced stillness became a catalyst for profound personal change. It wasn't easy, and there were definitely days I just wanted things to go back to normal. But looking back, I wouldn't trade that time. It forced me to look inward and build a foundation that felt more authentic and resilient.
The Power of Books in a Time of Isolation
Turning Pages for Solace
When everything outside felt uncertain and frankly, a bit scary, I found myself drawn to the quiet comfort of books. It was like stepping into a different world, one where I could control the narrative and escape the anxieties of the day. My bookshelf, which had been gathering dust for a while, suddenly became my most prized possession. I started with old favorites, the ones that felt like a warm hug, and then slowly ventured into new territory. It was amazing how a simple story could provide such a profound sense of peace when my own life felt so unsettled. Reading became my sanctuary, a place where I could just be.
Discovering New Perspectives
Beyond just comfort, books opened my eyes to so many different ways of thinking and living. I read about people who had overcome incredible challenges, about different cultures, and about ideas I'd never even considered before. It was like having conversations with brilliant minds from all over the world, right there in my living room. I stumbled upon a collection of recommendations specifically for introverts, which was a revelation. It helped me understand myself and my own needs better, especially during a time when social interaction was so limited. It’s funny how you can feel so alone, yet find so much connection within the pages of a book. It really made me think about how we all process the world differently, and that's okay.
Finding Purpose Through Reading
As I read more and more, I started noticing a pattern. Many of the books I gravitated towards were about personal growth, finding meaning, and even starting new paths. It was as if the authors were speaking directly to my situation, offering guidance and inspiration. One book, in particular, talked about how crises can actually be opportunities for change. It made me question what I really wanted out of life and what kind of impact I wanted to make. This shift in perspective, fueled by the stories and insights from these books, was the first step towards realizing that maybe this pause wasn't just a setback, but a chance to build something new and more meaningful. It was a slow burn, but the seeds of purpose were definitely being planted.
The quiet hours spent with books during that strange time weren't just about passing the time; they were about rebuilding my inner world and finding the courage to imagine a different future.
My Journey into Finding Purpose
During the early months of lockdown, days blurred together. I had so much time, and none of it felt useful. I wandered from one half-finished project to the next, feeling that old sense of restlessness growing stronger. But then, something clicked: I realized that maybe I could finally try the things I'd kept putting off. I found myself reaching for books I’d never made time for and scribbling notes about my feelings. That stack of journals became my therapy, and slowly, a spark lit inside me.
Looking back at dreams I’d shelved in the rush of everyday life
Using boredom as a way to get honest with myself
Testing out hobbies without worrying about getting them "right
Sometimes, a little idleness is what it takes—it's as if life needs to be paused before you can actually hear what your heart is trying to say.
Embracing a New Path
I didn’t set out to reinvent my life. Honestly, it just happened in bits—one day picking up a pen, another day figuring out how slow living leads to meaning. Everything felt uncertain, but after a while, the uncertainty became less scary and more like a blank canvas. I started writing about my own experience, which felt strange, but it also felt real.
Here are a few ways I eased into my new direction:
Allowed myself to go "off-script" and stop following old routines
Accepted feeling lost as part of the process
Paid attention to what genuinely interested me, not just what I thought I "should" do
I was surprised by the sense of freedom once I let go of my worn-out plans.
Personal Growth Through Writing
Putting words on a page forced me to slow down and notice things I'd ignored for years. Writing wasn’t just a distraction—it was how I processed everything changing around me. The more I wrote, the more I understood that my voice and story mattered, even if only to myself.
Here's what I learned from making writing a regular habit:
Writing gave me a sense of progress, even on days when life was stuck
I discovered how sharing my experiences helped others relate to their own
Reflecting through words made me kinder to myself and more open to what's ahead
By journaling and reflecting, I found purpose in the middle of uncertainty. It’s funny, but it’s true: sometimes standing still is where you figure out how to move forward.
Lessons Learned from a World on Hold
Resilience in the Face of Adversity
It's funny how a global event can make you realize just how tough people can be. When everything got turned upside down, we all had to figure things out on the fly. Whether it was adapting to working from home, keeping the kids entertained without school, or just figuring out how to get groceries, we found ways. This period really showed me that we're all a lot more adaptable than we give ourselves credit for. It wasn't always pretty, and there were definitely days I felt like I was failing, but we kept going. It’s like that saying about how pressure makes diamonds – I think we all came out a little stronger, a little more capable of handling whatever life throws at us next.
The Importance of Inner Well-being
Before all this, I was always rushing, always focused on the next thing. My own well-being kind of took a backseat. But when the world slowed down, I had no choice but to pay attention to myself. It was a forced reset, and honestly, it was overdue. I started noticing how much better I felt when I made time for things that actually recharged me, not just things that looked good on paper. It wasn't just about bubble baths and face masks, though those helped! It was about really listening to my body and mind.
Here are a few things that became non-negotiable for me:
Mindful Moments: Even just five minutes of quiet breathing made a difference.
Movement: Finding ways to get my body moving, even if it was just a walk around the block.
Connection: Making an effort to really talk to friends and family, not just surface-level stuff.
Creative Outlets: Picking up old hobbies or trying new ones, just for the fun of it.
This time taught me that taking care of yourself isn't selfish; it's actually the foundation for everything else you want to do and be.
Cultivating Gratitude
It sounds cliché, I know, but when you strip away all the usual distractions and routines, you start to see what really matters. I found myself feeling thankful for the little things more often. The fact that I had a roof over my head, food on the table, and people I cared about – these things felt huge. It wasn't about ignoring the bad stuff, but about actively looking for the good. It shifted my perspective from what I was missing to what I already had. It's a practice, for sure, and some days are harder than others, but focusing on gratitude really changed the overall tone of my days. It helped me see that even in tough times, there’s still so much to appreciate, like the student experiences during the pandemic that showed resilience in unexpected ways.
Navigating Life After the Pause
Carrying Forward Newfound Purpose
So, the world started spinning again, right? It felt a little weird at first, like stepping back into a movie that had been paused for way too long. But here's the thing: I wasn't the same person who hit play. That quiet time, the forced slowdown, it really did something. I found this new direction, this purpose that felt so much more me than what I was doing before. It wasn't just about getting back to normal; it was about building a new normal, one that actually felt right.
It’s funny how life throws you curveballs. One minute you’re on one track, and the next, you’re looking at a whole new landscape. For me, that shift came from digging into books and realizing how much I loved putting words together. It’s like a light bulb went off. This writing thing? It’s not just a hobby; it’s my calling.
The Lasting Impact of the Pandemic
Looking back, the pandemic was a massive disruption, no doubt about it. It shook things up for everyone. But it also gave us a chance to really think about what matters. We learned to appreciate the small stuff, the quiet moments, and the people who are truly there for us. It forced a reset, and while it was tough, it also opened doors we never knew existed. It showed us we’re more resilient than we thought.
Inspiring Others to Find Their Calling
Now, I feel this pull to share what I’ve learned. If my story can help even one person realize they can pivot, find their passion, or just feel less alone in their own journey, then that’s a win. It’s about embracing change, even when it’s scary, and trusting that there’s a path forward, often one that’s better than we could have imagined. It’s a reminder that sometimes, the biggest breakthroughs happen when everything else stops. If you’re feeling stuck, remember that taking some intentional solitude can really help you gain clarity intentional solitude is a superpower.
Here’s a little something I’ve been thinking about:
Be Kind to Yourself: This whole experience was a lot. Don't beat yourself up if you're still figuring things out.
Embrace the Unexpected: Life rarely goes exactly to plan. Be open to where the detours might lead.
Keep Learning: Whether it's through books, courses, or just talking to people, never stop growing.
Connect Authentically: Cherish the real relationships you have. They’re what truly matter.
So, What Now?
Looking back, it’s wild to think how much life can change when everything stops. The world felt like it was on pause, but for me, it was actually the start of something new. I learned that sometimes, the biggest detours lead you exactly where you need to be. It wasn't easy, and there were definitely days I just wanted things to go back to normal. But by leaning into the quiet and figuring out what truly mattered, I found a path I never expected. It’s a good reminder that even when things feel stuck, there’s always a way to move forward and find your own kind of purpose.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does it mean for life to be 'put on hold' during the pandemic?
It means that many of the things we used to do, like going to school, work, or seeing friends, suddenly stopped or changed a lot. It felt like everything just paused because of the virus. This gave people a lot of unexpected free time and a chance to think about their lives.
How did the pandemic help people find their calling?
When life slowed down, people had more time to think about what truly makes them happy and what they are good at. Some discovered new hobbies, learned new skills, or realized they wanted to change their careers. It was a time for looking inward and figuring out what really matters.
Can books really help when you feel alone?
Absolutely! Books can be like friends when you're by yourself. They can take you to different worlds, teach you new things, and help you understand your own feelings better. Reading can be a great way to feel less lonely and find comfort.
What's the 'spark of inspiration' the article talks about?
That's that moment when you suddenly get a great idea or feel really excited about something new. For many, the quiet time during the pandemic sparked ideas for new projects, hobbies, or even big life changes they had always dreamed of but never had the chance to pursue.
What does 'resilience' mean in tough times?
Resilience is like being a strong rubber band – even when things stretch you out or push you down, you can bounce back. It's about being able to handle difficult situations, learn from them, and keep going without giving up. The pandemic taught many people how strong they really are.
How can I keep the good things I learned after the pandemic?
Think about what you discovered about yourself and what's important to you. Maybe you learned to appreciate simple things, found a new passion, or realized the value of connection. Try to keep those lessons alive in your everyday life. You can also share your experiences to help others find their way too.
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